Sitting on a cross country train
He sits next to his Guatemalan wife
That he met on mission trip during seminary school
His bulbous blue eyes bulging from his head
As if they want to escape
He recounts
“I saw a picture of her before I left for Guatemala
Just one of the many women I would meet when I arrived
And I said to my colleague
‘I’m going to marry this one!’
Now it has been 30 years”
As he tells the story, your focus drifts to his wife
She has had 2 children with him
Both of whom work in film
Just like you
His wife sits next to him in the diner car
Silent
Making faces at the story he tells
She doesn’t like to talk about this
You ask her what she thought of him when
he first came to Guatemala
She says
“Many of the girls were interested in him-”
He interjects- “I was so clueless to that stuff!”
“But I would avoid him. Eventually we were married”
The story stops there
You will never hear anything else
But you will think about it
Maybe too much
-
Walking into the Airbnb
The host greets you at the door
asking
“Are you Korean?”
You say “I’m not sure”
She responds
“I think you are”
She explains the workings of the house
She mentions her children
Who she had with her white husband
Her white husband
who you can hear
in the other room
Yelling on the phone
From the darkness
She talks about how her children don’t care about her
no matter what she does
They take her for granted
and she has no social life
And no friends
Her body gets more tense as she speaks
You mention what happened to you as a child
Her face does not move as you speak
And she responds
“25 years ago
I had a son with another white man
When I first arrived in America
He decided to take the child away
and hide him from me
I haven’t seen him since
He would be your age now”
She is about to cry
but leaves the room before she can
Doing the dishes
You don’t speak for the rest of your trip
Only overhearing her taking the kids to school
Giving them reminders
Until you leave
Getting in a carpool with strangers to venture into the mountains
She puts her hand on your shoulder while saying goodbye
And says
“Don’t expect anything
If you expect nothing
You will be happy”
You walk away and get into the car
You will never hear anything else
But you will think about it
Too much
For the rest of your life
